Sunday, 7 August 2016

Defining success in your twenties


A couple of weeks ago I published a post about having found my inspiration in blogging once more, and a big part of having found that drive to go out and create without fear has been letting go of comparison - trying to stop measuring the success of my blog by pageviews and instagram likes. 

Writing that post and seeing the positive feedback from you guys got me thinking about other aspects of my life. Like most of my readers I'm at a bit of a weird age. It's been a few years since I left university, but not quite long enough that I feel like an established and put together adult.

I'm currently saving like mad to try and buy our first home, trying to put as much into this blog as possible without letting my real-life day job and social life suffer, and constantly finding myself green with envy looking at those who seem to have it all fall into place.

Jealousy is a difficult demon to exorcise. It can lead to a sense of self-entitlement, or leave you feeling utterly defeated, like your goal is just too far out of reach. Whether it's a flashy car, opportunities to travel, the dream job, 15 minutes of fame, a dream home, these things don't come easy to most. It's tempting when comparing yourself to others from afar to feel hard done by, but it's also easy to forget that hard work and determination do eventually pay off, even if not quite when you want it to.

I've never been one to just wing it, and it's hard to shake off negativity when something doesn't work out. I've taken to reminding myself that nobody is going to serve me the things I want on a plate, and that that's perfectly OK. I have plenty of successes to shout about - 24 years worth to be exact. I have a first class degree in a subject I'm deeply passionate about, am working in the industry of my choice, I have good chunk of money saved, a roof over my head, and a trip to our third country in the last 12 months just weeks away. I'm not a homeowner, or a YouTube celebrity, nor have a founded my own start-up, and while those are all amazing things, they just aren't the be-all and end-all for people my age.

The things you want won't come overnight. They won't turn up on your doorstep the day before you turn 25, or even 30. By all means work hard and give everything your all, but don't beat yourself up, don't subscribe to what the world 'says' you should be, and don't forget to enjoy the ride while you're still young. Achieving your own goals on your own terms in your own time.

How do you define success? Do you have any goals, or tend to just wing it?


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9 comments

  1. This is an excellent post! I loved reading it, as much like you I feel very similar to how you have described feeling in this post. It's hard not to be envious of other sometimes, but reminding yourself how hard you've worked for what you've got, and how hard others worked for what they have is always a good thing to do! I think success comes down to putting that first step down and saying where you want to go - you might not even reach your end goal because of thoughts changing or circumstances but you've been successful enough to even put yourself out there in the first place! Great read..

    Suitcase and Sandals Blog XX

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    1. Thanks so much for taking the time to comment Hannah. It's something I really feel needs saying sometimes - there's a lot of pressure on people our age and I'm done trying to prove myself!

      xx

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  2. Really great post I really enjoyed reading it! 😀

    Sophiekate.co.uk

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  3. Great post! I think it's important to take a step back from time to time and remind yourself you're doing ok. It's the people in your life and the ways you spend your time which make you happy.

    Nina | www.wordsbynina.com

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    1. Oh absolutely! I always think about that saying - that in old age you're never going to look back on life and think "God I wish I worked much harder so I could've had that fancy BMW! xx

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  4. I really enjoyed reading this post. Turning 25 sent me into something of a panic. Why hadn't I bought a house yet? Am I in the right job? Should I take blogging more seriously?
    I think I had some idea in my head that I should have achieved something more by now. I didn't see myself living at home or working in the industry I do... But I finally realised it doesn't matter. It's up to me and the hard work I put in to make things successful, not anyone else. I've stopped thinking so much about what others think I should be doing and now I'm trying it my way instead. xoxo

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  5. I can definitely relate to feeling like that!! Thank you for reading :) xx

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  6. Loving this post. Exactly what I needed to read right now. My life is not going the way it 'should' be, but I am making the most out of it and trying to get things back on track :)
    www.clashingtime.co.uk

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